Too Many Man (We Need More Girls In Here)

There is a family in our neighborhood who we are friends with, and the four kids (or as I like to call them "the delightful children from down the lane") all train at the dojo. The youngest of them, seven year-old Marisa, was getting ready for Judo in the women's locker room while I was changing after Jiu-Jitsu class yesterday, and she said to me "I'm the only girl in Judo just like you're the only girl in Jiu-Jitsu!". It was funny because there was another little girl putting on a Judo gi in the locker room at the same time, so I asked "What about her?", and Marisa said "Oh, she hasn't been here very long." (it didn't sound like she expected her to stay!). I told Marisa that I wasn't the only girl in Jiu-Jitsu, but that the others hadn't been coming to class on Tuesday or Thursday for awhile, so she didn't get to see them when she was there for Judo.

Then it occurred to me that I have not grappled with a woman since the last Jiu-Jitsu tournament I competed in, which was eleven months ago! I guess I'm just used to only rolling with men now. After I start training at the new BJJ school (name confirmed: Lincoln Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu!) Marisa won't see me anymore, and then she'll think that no women train Jiu-Jitsu at the dojo, and actually, she'll be right. There are only three of us there currently (the same as when I started). Sara and I are both leaving, and although Amy is staying at the dojo, she plans to only train Judo, not Jiu-Jitsu. I sure hope we have a better success rate in attracting and retaining woman at LBJJ than we did at the dojo. I'm afraid I'm going to get poisoned by testosterone!

More than a Woman

Shihan is the one standing on the right,
with his gi top partially open.

Shihan has a group picture of the Sho-Rei-Kan dojo from 1959, and when I first saw it I was surprised that there were a couple of women in it. Sometimes I wonder what it was like for them, training martial arts in Japan in the 1950s. I can't imagine their path was an easy one.

For all the complaints women might have today; that there aren't enough of us training or competing, that we don't always get the same respect as the men; we still have it a lot better than our foremothers did. If not for them blazing the trail, our acceptance would be that much more difficult.

Warrior women in Japan were actually somewhat common at one point, which Sensei Gary talks about in his article Onna Bugeisha: The First Female Martial Artists of Japan. Unfortunately, misogyny took over, and it still has a hold to this day, as evidenced by the initial refusal to award Keiko Fukuda-Sensei a 10th dan in Judo, simply for being a woman. Thankfully, she did receive that acknowledgement before her death last month. She gave her entire life to Judo, and I think she deserved better in return.

None of my teachers at the dojo have ever treated me as "less than" because I'm a woman (some of the students, yes, but never the teachers). I have always been awarded the same respect for the amount of work I put in. I appreciate that my Sensei understand gender isn't what makes or breaks a fighter. Woman sweat the same, we bleed the same, and we feel the same pain as the men. The only real difference is, whether we like it or not, we fight for all womankind.

Sharing is caring

Kori came back to women's Jiu-Jitsu class yesterday, and I think she's going to stay around for awhile!  We focused on mount escape theory, and I was afraid we might have overloaded her with too much information, but after I got home she sent me a message saying she remembered all of the escapes we worked on, and she wrote them down!

The majority of class consisted of me mounting her as she practiced the escapes, with increased resistance.  Amy told her that some of the escapes were more difficult to execute against me because I am a smaller person, and she would find them easier to do against someone bigger.  Kori responded "So, if I learn to do them against Gina, they'll work on anyone!".

At one point when Kori was supposed to chose which escape to use, Amy said I was being a bad partner because I was positioned on the center of her body with my feet tucked under her (which is my preferred mount these days), therefore I was too high for her to do the first three escapes we had practiced, and too low for the fourth.  However, I pointed out that this was a good opportunity to show her how to wriggle herself into position for the desired escape, regardless of how I was mounted.  Though maybe it was too soon for that, I don't want to overwhelm her.

Having a new student in our women's Jiu-Jitsu class again is awesome!  Learning Jiu-Jitsu can sometimes be frustrating, especially at the beginning, when there's so much you don't know.  Kori has a great attitude, and a strong desire to learn, so we're really excited to share everything we know with her.  Somehow I previously missed the detail about her husband being a wrestler, so now I'm looking forward to teaching her some submissions, then one day hearing her say she tapped him out with one! ;)

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to submit my own husband when we rolled after the women's class.  I was probably ahead a brazillion points to zero, but then he got me with a gi choke that I did not take seriously enough.  Technically I did not lose, since he let go before I tapped (because he knew I was choking), but I still think I could've gotten out of it...I guess now we'll never know.

A New Hope

Our women's Jiu-Jitsu class was officially canceled a couple of months ago, so Amy's just been teaching my husband and I on Sundays.  Then last week I received a message from fellow blogger and Jiu-Jitsu student Josh saying he knew a lady who was interested in trying it out, and she was disappointed it had been canceled.  I told her we would be there at noon on Sunday, and that she was more than welcome to join us, which she did.

Kori's been training Hapkido with Josh for about a year, and I believe she also trains Taekwondo.  She had been exposed to some grappling, but she hadn't really received much instruction, so she wanted to check out Jiu-Jitsu.  Her previous grappling experience had been more mixed; including striking, pressure points, and even hair-pulling!  I think her martial arts training helped make her a quick student, and Amy complimented her willingness to go for it, she wasn't afraid to try do anything we practiced.  I really enjoyed working with her, and I hope she felt the same.

I don't like to get my hopes up anymore when new women come in, because even though they all say they had a lot of fun and they'll be back, I never see most of them again.  The only women currently attending our regular Jiu-Jitsu classes are Sara and I, the same as when I started training over three years ago.

I do think Kori enjoyed the class and learned some things, but she lives an hour away from Lincoln, so I don't know if she liked it enough to make the drive every week.  We'd love to have her as a student, and Amy already has her next few classes planned if she decides to come back.

Shihan actually scolded me for going to class on Sunday, because I am still supposed to be taking time off to heal, but I was careful with my injury, and I don't think it did any harm.  I certainly wasn't about to miss the rare opportunity to share Jiu-Jitsu with a new woman!

She's Always a Woman

It never ceases to amaze me when guys who I train with are shocked to find out that I can be girly.  When one of the Daitoryu students saw me with a purse, he said it was weird to see me carrying one.  Sensei Tracey (who is a man) said "Well, what do you expect her to have, a tool belt?".  Later that same student remarked that he thought I was just carrying the purse to use as an "attack bag".

At the last Karate convention, a young man told me he was amazed by the fact that I paint my nails all pretty, since I compete in tournaments.  Apparently those two things are mutually exclusive in his mind.  One day when I was injured I went to Jiu-Jitsu class to take pictures, and I had my hair down, and makeup on.  About halfway through class Adam looked at me and said in astonishment "Oh, it's Gina!"  Up until that point he'd had no idea who the lady walking around the mat taking pictures was.  Amy told me that once when she saw Conan outside of the dojo, he didn't recognize her, because she was wearing high heels.

It seems as though women who train martial arts are often perceived as being less feminine, so I suppose it's shocking for some men to see us when we look more traditionally female.  When I'm training, I actually kind of want the men to forget that I'm a woman, so I guess I shouldn't mind when they do.

I can be a little on the girly side, and I can hold my own in a dojo full of men.  I don't wear makeup when I train, and I don't go around town beating people up with my "attack bag".  There's a time and place for everything, and most people only see one aspect at a time, so I think it sometimes just surprises them to see a different side.

Not Men

Yesterday during Jiu-Jitsu class, Conan worked with the white belts, and he let the colored belts (Sara, Mike, and I) work on our own.  Even though Mike was the lowest ranking one of us, Sara and I both deferred and we let him (made him?) teach.  Once again, I am impressed with Mike's knowledge of Jiu-Jitsu, and his ability to teach it.  Sometimes when people explain things to me, it's like they are speaking a different language, but with Mike, I can always understand what he's saying.  It's obvious that he studies Jiu-Jitsu, and perhaps because he's a smaller guy he's really had to focus on technique, so he seems to have a strong grasp of the details.   He tells me why I should do things a certain way, which makes it easier for me to remember.  One of the things we worked on was a cross collar gi choke from mount, which I've practiced many times before, but when Mike was explaining it, I saw so many nuances I'd previously missed that it was almost like a brand new technique.

Part of the way through class, Josh showed up and joined the colored belt posse.  When we were trading partners, Mike asked Josh if he wanted to come over and try the technique on a "real man", instead of a "not man", which I thought was hilarious.  I guess Sara and I aren't "women", we're just "not men".  It did feel super cool that the two highest ranking students in class yesterday were not men!

I didn't do so well grappling with Mike and Josh at the end of class, because I recently tweaked my back, and I allowed the pain to distract me.  I didn't even really want to roll, but I'm glad I did.  After I rolled with Mike, he said "I want you to stop laying on your back in guard".  Yeah Mike, we all want that. 

Bubbles

Conan & Amy

I was just thinking about a conversation Amy and I had during Sunday's class, and it made me really appreciate her journey to gain the knowledge she's now sharing with me.  In a recent post I wrote about the pre-Conan Jiu-Jitsu class at the dojo, and how I was intrigued, but intimidated.  Well, Amy saw that same class every day as she was going to Judo, and instead of being afraid, she thought "That looks interesting, I think I want to try it.", and so she did.

At the time she joined the class it consisted of her and just a few men, all of whom already knew much more than she did.  They did not take it easy on her, and no other new students joined the class for her first few years of training.  Which meant that literally all Amy did when she grappled for those first years is to tap out, repeatedly.  She couldn't even begin to put together an offensive game, because every roll was an all out fight just to survive.

Blossom, Bubbles, Buttercup

She told me that is why it is so important to her that I am able to submit people, because she doesn't want me to spend all of my time just defending, like she did.  Although I am naturally an offensive fighter, my time spent training with Amy has definitely encouraged it.  When we are drilling or grappling, she will often push us to submit as fast as possible, or give us time limits in which to do so.

Amy's first Jiu-Jitsu instructor Darin was an MMA fighter, and he helped teach her how to persevere.  She often imparts lessons to me that she says came from him, like "Why are you tapping, you're not choking, stop being stupid!".  Almost all of our current Jiu-Jitsu students came up under Conan, but Amy was taught by both Darin and Conan, and I get the benefit of all of her knowledge.  She was the very first woman in our school to be belted in Jiu-Jitsu, and if it wasn't for Amy blazing the trail and helping me along, I honestly don't know if I would still be there.

Where My Girls At?

I'm afraid our women's Jiu-Jitsu class is in danger of becoming extinct. The reason we started it was to provide a friendly atmosphere for women who were thinking of trying Jiu-Jitsu, but who were uncomfortable jumping right in with the men. We wanted the women's class to be a place they could gain an understanding of the basics, with the goal being to then assimilate into the regular class. Unfortunately, it hasn't worked out that way. Although we have definitely had more women come through the women's class than the regular class over the past three years, and a few of them even stayed for awhile, we are now back down to Amy just teaching my daughter and I.

Skyler moved back into the dorm today, and although she will still be coming home on weekends, her tuition was raised, and she will most likely be working during our class time, to have enough money to stay in school. That leaves just me, alpha and omega, the first and last women's Jiu-Jitsu student. Amy doesn't really like teaching only one student, because it's a lot better with at least two.

Skyler, Karin, me, Erica

I would still like to continue the women's class, because I really enjoy Amy's teaching, and that is the only class she currently attends. I think I've found a temporary solution to the dilemma; I have convinced my husband to be declared an honorary woman, and come to class with me. That way I'll have a partner, and if any actual women show up, I guess he can go practice kata or something. It won't be as much fun as having Skyler there, especially since Joe will really start learning some Jiu-Jitsu, and then he will be even harder to submit!

Perhaps the class would be more successful if we opened it up to youth students, because I've noticed that many of the women's classes in other schools around the world seem to have a high percentage of girls. Shihan doesn't really want younger children training Jiu-Jitsu, but in the past he has given permission for a couple of preteens to train it. There is one 11 year-old karateka in particular who I would love to have as a student in our class. I even have an old gi that will fit her, and I think she would have a lot of fun with us.

Daddy's Girl

When I'm playing Fallout 3, I love it when the Super Mutants say "Stupid lady!" as I'm killing them, even though I've not really much of a "lady", I'm more like a broad or a dame (but not a floozy or a hussy!), which is perfectly fine with me.

My dad didn't have any sons, so he just did the things a father might do with them with us girls instead. We went fishing, played catch, helped him work on the car, and he would buy us "boy toys" (which I think was really just so he could play with them ;). I was always at his side, and I don't know if it was the things we did as much as that I just liked spending time with him. I especially didn't care for fishing (oh, so boring), but one of my fondest memories involves my dad and I painting my Mustang when I was sixteen (too bad I wrecked it a couple of months later!).

My sisters and I mowed the lawn, changed the oil in our own cars, took out the trash. My dad would not let us get drivers licenses until we could change a tire by ourselves. When we kept fighting, he threatened to buy us boxing gloves and let us have at it. Yet, despite all of this, we never doubted or questioned that we were daddy's little girls. He made it clear to us that knowing how to do these things had nothing to do with our sex, and everything to do with our ability to be independent human beings. He loved his daughters, and he wanted to make sure we didn't limit ourselves to traditional gender roles. He always encouraged us to not let anyone tell us we couldn't do something just because we were female.

When I was a nineteen I was a department manager for a store, and one of the things I sold in my department was guns. I once had a male customer who refused to allow me to help him, and he asked for "a man", so I called one of the male store managers to assist him. When the manager found out that the reason the customer didn't want me to help him was because I was female, he said "Gina is the manager of this department, and she knows more about these guns than I do. If you want to buy one, you're going to have to buy it from her.", then he walked away. My manager risked losing a sale, and angering a customer, in order to stand up for womankind. I sold that asshole two guns that day.

Within my lifetime, women in the US were not allowed to have credit cards without a husband or father to co-sign for them. When I was born in 1969, women only had about five careers they could chose from; teacher, flight attendant, operator, nurse, or prostitute. We have come a long way in that time, but there's still a way to go. In the dojo not too long ago I had a male white belt karate student who did not want me (a black belt) to teach him simply because I'm a woman. I didn't call a "manager" for help that time, I just told him if he didn't want me to teach him, then he was free to leave.

I don't know if I could make it in a male-dominated world as a "lady", but this broad is equipped to deal with it, and still remain all woman as I do so. My daddy taught me well, and I think he would be proud.

Little Sister

Women's Jiu-Jitsu was extra special today, because we had a guest from out of town.   The lady who I competed against in no gi at the 2011 State Games, Lorissa, joined us for class.  She's from Kearney, Ne., and she and her husband were in Lincoln this weekend, so they went to the no gi class together, then Lorissa came to the women's class.

It was really great to see her, and to train with her.  She's almost my age, and she's about my size, which is a rare experience for me.  It's even more rare for her, because until recently she had no other women to train with.  A few months before the State Games, our dojo put on a small tournament and Lorissa competed in it, which was the very first time she had ever grappled with another woman!

She only trains no gi, and we were having gi class today, so she got to get a little bit of experience on gi chokes.  She wasn't wearing a gi, but we showed her how to use them against us.  The focus of class today was choking, so that was the only type of submissions we were allowed to use.  Of course, I mostly just tried to triangle her from all positions (partly because that's what I do, and partly because the other chokes still bother my achy breaky wrist).  I never once even came close to finishing one of those triangles.  Lorissa also has the most wicked mount defense I have ever experienced.  Even when I did manage to finally mount her, I could not hold it for more than maybe two seconds before we were in half guard.  She's a total leech with that tiny little body, there were no spaces anywhere!

Lorissa and her pigtails are more than welcome to share the mat with me anytime!  I am so glad that she took me up on the offer to come and train with us.  She and her husband have done Taekwondo for a long time, and several years ago they started training BJJ.  They now run a small school in their home, and if I'm ever in Kearney, I will definitely stop by! 

Making sense of self-defense

Writing a post that covers self-defense is difficult, because the concept varies greatly depending on who it is intended for. People who train martial arts are able to delve more deeply into the subject, and their focus is usually centered around the particular art they train (Judoka throw their attackers, Jiu-Jitsuka fight from the ground, Karateka strike and gouge out eyeballs...I'm generalizing, please bear with me). Self-defense training for them focuses on the strengths of their system, and it allows them to utilize more advanced techniques by building the necessary muscle memory.

People who do not train martial arts cannot learn this type of self-defense. It would take an entire training session to teach them just one technique, and it's doubtful that they would even remember it, let alone be able to effectively use it against an attacker. Even after I "learned" how to, it still took me months and months (and months) of practice before I was able to actually escape being mounted by a big dude during open mat.

Therefore, self-defense for non-martial artists has to be as simple and intuitive as possible. When Joe, Skyler, and I taught our self-defense class to untrained women, we did not really teach them any Karate, Jiu-Jitsu, or Judo techniques. We just taught them effective ways to disengage from the situation at the earliest possible time.

If you are attacked, it is highly unlikely that someone is just going to run up and tackle you. If you are a man, it's more likely that they will throw a punch at you, a woman will probably be grabbed. In a rape situation, he will have to somehow get a hold of you first (it's also important to note that not all rapes occur on the ground, you could also be pinned against a wall, etc). Therefore, the smart thing for women to do is to learn how to escape from grabs. The sooner you can free yourself and get away, the better chance you will have (this goes for both trained and untrained people).

I'm not going to go into all the different ways to escape from grabs (partly because I can't completely figure out how to explain on paper...or whatever it is the internet is made of ;) but I will discuss one of the easiest ways. No matter how they are grabbing you, if you can get a hold of the two middle fingers on their hand and pry them back, they will usually let go. Any combination of fingers could possibly work, but the middle two are ideal. It's also recommended that before trying to escape from the grab, you first distract them with some sort of percussive technique. An excellent choice is a good old-fashioned foot stomp. It's easy to remember and execute, and it's very effective.

The goal of this type of basic self-defense is to be able to get away from the situation as soon as you possibly can. The moment that you are no longer being held is the time to make your escape. Once you break their grip, you need to run like the wind, and yell as loud as you can "Call 911!" Most people have phones these days, and while they might not be willing to risk themselves to help you, studies show that they will call the police.

Everything we practiced in our basic self-defense class ended with the women running away.  So I guess I would say that the number one rule of self-defense would be to try to stay in good enough physical shape that you could run away if you ever had to.

"Keep it simple, keep it practical, let it make sense."- John Roseberry-Shihan

Keep it simple

Yesterday, the Ethridge's taught a women's self-defense class at the Lancaster County Health Department, for City of Lincoln employees, and I think it went very well. I have to admit I was a little nervous, because we've taught several children's classes, both in and outside of the dojo, but this is the first time we've ever taught a group of adults all on our own! We received a lot of positive feedback from the students, and the person who organized it said she would like to open it up to more people if we would be willing to do it again. Absolutely!

I was glad that I was not hindered by my injured wrist, so I was able to be a fully contributing member of the team. The highlight for me was probably when Joe had me in a standing rear naked choke, and I threw him with a hip toss. We didn't teach that to them, but we wanted to show what was possible with some training, and it was definitely a crowd pleaser!

I would never want to give anyone the impression that they can learn comprehensive self-defense in one class. We didn't try to teach anything complicated, and we explained to them that unless they practice regularly, they probably won't even be able to remember the simple things when they are in a stress situation. However, most of those women came into that class with no idea of what they would do if someone attacked them, and now they have a plan. A simple plan is better than no plan at all, and it might just give them enough confidence to not simply accept being a victim.

No Inch Nails

They weren't quite this long!

After one of my matches at a Jiu-Jitsu tournament, I noticed that my opponent had long fingernails, which surprised (and scared) me a little bit.  I was glad I didn't get scratched, or get an eye poked out!  I figured no long nails in Jiu-Jitsu was a given, but that incident made me want to start checking my competitor's hands before our matches.  Besides the safety factor, I can't imagine that long nails would be very beneficial to gripping.

For about twenty years before I started at the dojo, I always had long fingernails. My nails are very strong, and they grow fast. People usually thought they were fake, and I was pretty proud that they weren't. I used to love to paint them all crazy (okay, I still love to do that).

Then at my very first Karate class, I discovered that I could not make a proper fist without gouging myself in the palm. So as soon as I got home that night, I cut them to the quick, and I never looked back. I missed them a little bit at first; because I would use them as tools, and the tips of my fingers were sensitive from never being exposed; but I got used to it.

Now that I've had a broken wrist for the past month, I haven't been able to (nor really had the need to) keep my nails trimmed. Therefore, for the first time in about six and a half years, I have long fingernails again. They aren't even close to as long as they used to be, but I already hate them! They're so annoying, they just get in the way! Why in the world did I ever think they were cool?

I can still make a fist without drawing blood, so I suppose they are acceptable for now. Since I'm only able to use one arm at the moment, I figure they might be good weapons to hold onto for the time being, but as soon as I have access to my right arm again, they got to go!

Man, I Feel Like a Woman

I was watching a news show, and they were talking about women in MMA.  The gist of it was that there isn't a lot of support for it because the general public doesn't want to see it.  This is common to women's sports, but the report said it's even harder for people to accept women fighting.  It's not something we are supposed to do, it's not natural.

That is something I personally have a hard time accepting.  I am a woman, I love being a woman, I love womanly things...but I also love to fight.  I don't move, think, or feel like a man when I am sparring or grappling, and fighting does not feel "unnatural" to me.  What is unnatural is society convincing women that to be feminine they have to be weak and submissive.

I think the world needs to stop calling boys who are into the arts "sissies", and girls who are into sports "tomboys".  There is nothing unnatural about any of it.  I'm a woman, I beat people up, and I get beat up in return...get over it.

She wins!

The first Jiu-Jitsu tournament where I competed against people from outside my own school was the 2010 Cornhusker State Games. I won two and lost two that day, and the woman who beat me (and everyone else) in both gi and no gi was Becky Phillips. It was obvious to everyone that she was a force to be reckoned with.

On Saturday, she competed in the IBJJF World No-Gi Championship in Long Beach, CA, and she won silver in the women's blue belt medium-heavy division! I didn't get to see any of the matches, so I don't know how they went, but I think it's fantastic that a woman from our area placed so well. There were at least four women in her division, so I know she had to work for it! She's from Omaha, and is a member of Team Rodrigo Vaghi.

I guess I don't have to feel so bad anymore about her submitting me with two armbars at the State Games that year! I sometimes wonder about all the different women I've seen at tournaments, whether they are still competing, or even training anymore. It's nice to hear that not only is Becky still doing it, but she's doing well. She's a fun, cool chick with killer tattoos, who will tap you out and then give you a hug. I wish her continued success on her journey.

Don't Put Your Hands On Me

When I hear women say that they train martial arts strictly as a sport and they aren't concerned with the self-defense aspect, I have a hard time wrapping my mind around that. I don't think there's anything wrong with sport training, but if you're doing it anyway, why not also occasionally think about using it to defend yourself ? If it's because you don't believe you'll ever need to, I hope you're right.

Lincoln, Ne. is a medium-sized city with a small town feel, we do not have a high rate of violence. Yet, while living here, my aunt was the victim of a home invasion rape and robbery. She did not know her attacker, he kicked in her front door while she was asleep. My aunt was 4'11", 100 pounds, and he was over 6', 250 pounds. He brutally and repeatedly raped and beat her within inches of her life, and she was never the same again. There is a chance that if she had tried to defend herself, he could have killed her, but I believe it was a risk she would have been willing to take if she knew how. She always slept with a knife under her pillow after that.

My aunt never thought anything like that would ever happen to her either, but it did. She stayed with my grandma for awhile after it happened, and when my family was there visiting, I slept in my aunt's bed with her because she didn't like sleeping alone. I'm still haunted by hearing her cry about the abuse in her sleep. I think that incident forever changed me, too.

As someone who has also been a victim in my past, I know what it feels like to have no control and to be helpless, and I never want to feel that way again. That is why it's so important to me that the martial arts I'm training are valid and useful in real life. There's a 99% chance I will never have to find out, but that 1% chance is more than I'm willing to risk.

So, when I say things like "I will gouge out your eyes", in my mind I am talking to the kind of monster who brutalized my aunt and destroyed a part of her. I can guarantee that anyone like him does not want to mess with me. I really do not want to ever be forced to have to hurt someone, but I want to be prepared for it if I ever do. I want to at least have the option of fighting back against this kind of violence. I wish more women felt the same way.

Hey Ladies

One of these things is not like the others

When I'm in Jiu-Jitsu class I still sometimes feel utterly alone; because everyone is young or male (usually both) and I am neither. A man can walk into almost any Jiu-Jitsu class and have a built-in peer group and support system. Many women in the art have to seek out and create their own. This is why we decided to start a women's class a couple of years ago.

A man can teach you how to do Jiu-Jitsu, but he can't understand what it's like for a woman. Grappling with a man can teach you how to deal with size and strength differences, but it won't always prepare you to compete against a smaller, more flexible female. Women have different struggles and issues, we move differently and react differently than men do. Not better or worse, just different. To be able to share these things with other women, and have someone who understands our point of view, can make the difference in whether a women decides to stick with it.

The Dark Ninja and Sheriff Amy

We haven't picked up very many female students yet, but I do believe that more ladies have at least tried it due to having the option of an all-women class, which can be a less intimidating environment to practice in than a typical male-dominated one. The ladies at our school who keep showing up week after week to train together do so not only for ourselves, but for each other and for future females. The best way to support women in Jiu-Jitsu is to train together and share your knowledge and struggles. If you feel as though a women's class has nothing to offer you, perhaps you have something to offer them.

All it takes to create a support system is a couple of women who are willing to come together to help each other, and I am so grateful that I have that. As long as Amy keeps coming in to share her knowledge, I will always show up for her class. If she ever decides she doesn't want to do it anymore, then I suppose it will become my turn to teach the class. FYI, I hate teaching, but I would hate it even more if there were no women's class at all.

(Group pic: Ginger, Danger, B-Rad, The Doggfather, The Hulk, The Hulk's beard, Slonan, & Roast Beef)

Jiu-Jitsu Fool

I am an April fool. April is the month in 2009 when I started regularly training Jiu-Jitsu, and it's turned me into an obsessed fool who is willing to give up her dining room in exchange for a home mat. I almost can't believe it's been two years since I became an addict. When I started, I actually thought it would just be a part-time thing. I was so young then, so naive.

April '09 is also the first time I wrote for The Jiu-Jitsu Fighter blog. In honor of the anniversary, I thought I would re-post my first article here. I still agree with what I wrote, except that I don't think it's a bit uncomfortable or awkward anymore (that went away really quickly). Now I just think it's the best thing I've ever done in my life. No fooling.

Submissions are a Girl's Best Friend

I believe there are two kinds of women in the world: those who train Jiu-Jitsu, and those who need to. If you’re at all interested in self defense, you should know that most fights end up on the ground. Add to that the chance of sexual assault, and it becomes clear why women need to know how to defend themselves from the ground. Yet very few women, even those involved in the martial arts, have that kind of knowledge. I train Okinawan Goju-Ryu Karate, and as Shihan likes to say “It’s all in there”, meaning that we have throws, joint locks, chokes, etc. included in our system. This is true, but we rarely get a chance to actually work on them. Just like with all things, without practice we cannot become proficient. Even in Judo they don’t have the time to work on Ne Waza as much as they would like. This is evidenced by the Judoka who come to Jiu-Jitsu before a tournament to firm up their ground game.

So, this begs the question, if ground defense is so important, why don’t more women learn Jiu-Jitsu? In the interest of full disclosure, I have been to a few classes, but I do not train Jiu-Jitsu. The reason for this is (insert excuse here). However, I realize that it is something that is lacking in my own training, and something that I want to do. When I’ve mentioned this to some female Karateka, the reaction I’ve gotten is that I must be some kind of alien. Lets face it, Jiu-Jitsu can be a very uncomfortable undertaking for anyone, but most classes are 99% male. For a lot of women, the idea of wrestling unknown men is not a pleasant one. Besides, as Amy W. says, you guys are heavy! My thoughts on it are this: if you have no experience doing it, and are uncomfortable with it, how are you going to react when faced with a real life situation, and someone who’s trying to hurt you? The only way I learned to stop closing my eyes and flinching when someone threw a punch to my head was by having someone throw about 2,000 punches to my head until I got used to it.

To all my sisters out there...yes, it’s uncomfortable and awkward. Yes, they are strong and heavy. But wouldn’t you rather learn to handle that in a safe environment? Even if you never have to use what you learn on the street, which is hopefully the case, there is still one more reason to train. Every woman I know who has done Jiu-Jitsu agrees, it is super fun…are we really going to let the guys keep that all to themselves?

In this spirit, I wrote a haiku:

They may be stronger
But we are more flexible
And can make them tap

Tuff Fighter

I woke up this morning to discover that I have yet another black eye. I'm not sure how it happened, I don't remember anything that could have caused it yesterday in womens jiu-jitsu class. It was probably given to me by the newest member of our class, after all, she is a cage fighter! Just kidding, I probably gave it to myself, I'm good at doing things like that. Even if she did have a part in it, she can give me black eyes every week for all I care, because I'm so excited to have her in our class.

Her name is Kristy Gynan, and she is just beginning her amateur MMA career. She has had one fight so far at the Tuff Love event with the Cornhusker Fight Club, which she won by split decision. A couple of weeks ago, she sought us out to help her improve her ground game, and we were more than happy to oblige. She fits right into our class, and it's really cool that we don't have to play all nice with her, because she's a tough dame. She has voiced the intention to stick around, and I am really looking forward to seeing her skills improve, and supporting her in her MMA endeavors. After all, she is living my dream! I also think having her in class is really going to help Skyler and I improve. Besides, we were getting tired of just beating each other up in womens class all the time.

So, welcome Kristy to the Roseberry's family! We are very happy and proud to have her on our team.

Girl Power

The first time I remember meeting Sara is also the first time I sparred anyone. We were doing free-sparring in karate class, and I, as a white belt, was paired up with brown belt Sara. When the Sensei said hajime, she stepped forward and quickly punched me in the stomach three times, then she said "Three points, I win." I responded "So you can beat up someone who doesn't know anything, I'm so impressed." She stopped, smiled, and said "Hey, I like you!" Thus began the chronicles of Sara and Gina.

I don't think I can explain the phenomenon that is Sara better than Conan did in his post I fight like a girl. My friendship with her has existed from that first meeting on the floor, and it grew even stronger when I started jiu-jitsu. She had already been training for a few months, and her presence in the class helped me to feel more comfortable joining.

The women's jiu-jitsu teacher Amy was the first woman in the dojo to receive a colored belt in jiu-jitsu, and Sara and I were the second and third. Amy is unable to come to regular classes right now because of her job, so most of the time Sara and I are the only women attending. You almost have to be friends in a situation like that, but luckily Sara and I really care about each other. We sometimes butt heads, but at the end of the day we still support and love one other.


I think women who train jiu-jitsu are probably the coolest women on the planet, and Sara is no exception. We've laughed together, cried together, fought and danced with each other. We are both better women for having met, and outside of martial arts that probably never would have happened. I'm lucky to have her on my side and she will always be my girl.