Since I started at the dojo (and throughout my life, really), I've had a pattern of telling myself that I couldn't do things. I told myself that I would fail, that I wasn't good enough. When I started training, my instructors tried to convince me that the true learning wasn't in the succeeding, it was in the trying, but I never felt as though I honored them, because I wasn't worthy. I've never been as good as I think I should be.
If I had a dollar for every time I told myself (or someone else) that I sucked at martial arts, I could start my own dojo (but I would not recommend anyone train there, the teacher sucks! ;). Putting myself down wasn't doing me any good, and it sure wasn't instilling any confidence in the people I was supposed to teach. Also, before most of my competitions, I told myself that I was going to lose, and lo and behold, I usually lost!
Then my Jiu-Jitsu instructor Amy told me that the reason I sucked was because I thought I sucked, and from then on I wasn't allowed to say that I sucked anymore, I was only supposed to say I'm Awesome. I didn't really believe it (I was just trying to go along with her). Oddly enough, it still worked. When I stopped focusing on how much I thought I sucked, I actually got better, and when I stopped telling other people how much I thought I sucked, they started respecting me more. Conan once said "If you keep telling people you suck, they're going to believe you."The truth is, I still pretty much think I suck, but you didn't hear Muhammad Ali going around saying "I am not now, nor will I ever be, the greatest!" When I say things on this blog like "I will not lose!", or "I am so hot, in my skills there be propane!", I don't really believe that shit, it's false bravado. It is intended for the purpose of counteracting my own natural tendency to be negative towards myself. Since I don't have a hype-man, Ginger has to do it for me.
At home I am a nice guy: but I don't want the world to know. Humble people, I've found, don't get very far." -Muhammad Ali