So, my entire body was still in pain from doing two Jiu-Jitsu classes back to back on Sunday, mainly because the second one consisted entirely of throwing, but I decided to go to class today anyway, thinking "How bad could it be?", then I got there, and Ray taught throwing for most of class! I was like "Are you freaking kidding me?". Well, at least I didn't have to do any teaching.
I was actually able to make it through the entire throwing portion of class before my back started seizing up, and my bruised ribs felt like someone had been repeatedly punching them. It probably wouldn't be so bad if I could ever learn to relax when practicing takedowns! I made the smart decision and just watched for the rest of class, but I hate doing that, because I really want to participate. Last week, I suppose in reference to the fact that I haven't been doing open mat as much, one of my teammates told Joe that he thought my "problem" was that I'm afraid of being submitted. Bitch, please! I bet I have been submitted more than anyone else there, since 99% of the students can easily submit me, and if I was afraid of it, I would've quit a long time ago.
What I am afraid of, as a person with no health insurance, is being injured to the point where I need medical assistance, which I can't afford. If I was to ever require surgery, it would probably send my family into bankruptcy, so I walk a fine line between trying to train as much as possible, without becoming seriously injured. I know it could happen at any time without warning, but nowadays I take try to take whatever precautions I can. If that means people think I'm a wuss or a chicken when I don't roll or when I step out of class, so be it. I can take being submitted, I can take pain, but I can't take stupid chances that also affect the people I love.