Well, I've tried everything I can think of to get out of competing in the Jiu-Jitsu tournament next Saturday, but "they" won't let me. I even pulled a calf muscle (which Amy thinks I'm faking, and I wish I was) so I could use the injury as an excuse to not compete, but I was told that if I try to back out of the tournament, I will be hog-tied, thrown in the car, and driven to Omaha against my will. I can't even call the police and report the kidnapping threat, because, well, it was a sheriff who ordered Joe to do it!
I decided to figure out exactly what my competition record is so far, and I was actually pleasantly surprised when I looked at the numbers. Out of twenty-five matches, I have won ten and lost fifteen. All but four of those were by submission. I've only won two, and lost two, by points. My record is not as bad as I thought.
I've really just been lacking in motivation lately, but having Amy tell me that backing out of the competition is not an option seems to have shifted something in my brain. I know that no matter what might happen in my matches, the only way I can really disappoint anyone is if I don't compete at all. I'm not 100% right now (but really, when have I ever been?) but I don't have any reason to not do the tournament, except for fear.
So, it looks like I'm going to be competing on the 20th. I only have six days to find my awesome! I'm pretty sure that it's somewhere on the mat, so I guess I'll need to spend a lot of time there looking for it this week.