I'm Awesome

I believe I have a rare condition known as Jiu-Jitsu Dyslexia. The people who suffer from this affliction will often do the exact opposite of what you tell them to. It's not on purpose, things just seem to get mixed up in their brain. If you show them an underhook, they will do an overhook. If you tell them to straighten their left leg, they will straighten their right. It would comical if it were not so tragic.

Okay, there is no such condition, but I'm not joking when I say that I think I'm Jiu-Jitsu learning disabled. I can't tell you how many times I have done something and my partner said "No, do it like this", and I'm thinking "But, that IS what I did, isn't it?" I literally cannot see how what they are doing is different than what I am doing. Yesterday when I was working with Bauer on a sacrifice throw and I just could not get it, he stopped and demonstrated each step along the way, and he made me mimic him so I could understand exactly what my body was supposed to be doing at all times.

The good news is that people like me can learn Jiu-Jitsu, it just might take a little longer, and it requires dedication and constant studying. In the end, I think we might make for better students, because we have to pay attention, and by the time we actually learn something, we usually have a solid understanding of it. Our knowledge of the struggle could also help make us better teachers eventually. Although I might sometimes feel like I'm a slow learner, what really matters is that I'm still there, and I'm constantly improving. My Jiu-Jitsu IQ is steadily on the rise, and it gets easier for me to learn new things all the time.

I have a tendency to be hard on myself, and last Sunday in women's class Amy said to me "You suck because you think you suck", and I said "No, I think I suck because I suck". I believed that the evidence proved I was right, but when I really examined it, it actually showed the opposite. So I'm no longer allowed to say that I suck, because it's not true. I have come a long, long way, and I do not suck at Jiu-Jitsu anymore. Now I intend to be awesome because I think I'm awesome, and I expect to be a Jiu-Jitsu genius someday.

"It's lack of faith that makes people afraid of meeting challenges, and I believed in myself." -Muhammad Ali

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