Asking for it

Conan's post on The Jiu-Jitsu fighter yesterday, "Mentoring", made me think about something that's been on my mind for a little while. All of my Jiu-Jitsu seniors have helped me along the way, but I think it's human nature to seek to develop personal mentoring relationships, and they usually happen naturally. These types of one-on-one connections are beneficial to both the junior and the senior.

I am very fortunate to be able to call Conan and Amy my Jiu-Jitsu mentors, but I don't feel like I have really developed that kind of relationship with any of the students. I don't want to always be going to the head teachers for help, and they aren't always available.

So for awhile now, I have been wanting to ask one of the seniors in Jiu-Jitsu to be my "big brother". I know exactly who I want it to be. He has already shown that he takes an interest in my training, and he often helps me. I want him to mentor me because I feel like it would be a good fit for both of us. I enjoy his straight-forward approach, and I respond well to it. He tells me exactly what I need (not want) to hear. The problem is, I think I may be giving him the impression that I'm not interested in his help, because I have a hard time approaching him, even when he's completely available. Sorry bro, I just suck at expressing myself in person. I really do want to work with you.

I don't think he reads my blog, or knows anything about the way I feel. Should I tell him? What if he doesn't want to spend his time on me? Would asking him for help be too much pressure, would he feel obligated to oblige? Is it stupid to even think that I have to ask him to be my mentor? It might be more that I just want to let him know that I already consider him to be one.

The mystery mentor is in this picture.  Guess who it is and win a prize! (Disclaimer: I lied, there is no prize.)