Dining room mat

I've been trying to figure out where I can move my table so that I can put a mat down on the dining room floor. It seems like the most logical place. I'm serious! I am amazingly lucky enough to have two people who live with me who both know some jiu-jitsu, so if we had a mat I could grapple whenever I wanted, without even having to leave my house!

Just think of the possibilities. Whenever my husband or daughter make me mad, I could just say "Meet me on the mat!" Or when salespeople come to the door, I could say "Sure, I'll buy...but only if you can tap me out!" Especially those annoying Girl Scouts, always trying to sell me some damn cookies.

There's still the matter of the table to contend with, though. Maybe I'll just give it away, and we can get some pillows and eat on the mat, Japanese style. If guests complain,
they will receive a complimentary armbar with their meal.

I predict that I will have a mat in my house within a short amount of time. So if you come visiting, you should expect to be asked if you want to roll. Don't worry, as a good hostess I will let you tap me out. Or at least I will tell you that I let you if you do.